If you guys didn't already know, then this blog is a project for my university degree. But it cannot be a blog, it has to be a website.
For the next couple of weeks, instead of focusing on content, I will be focusing on creating the website and its features. I will update you with the BFI review next week and maybe a couple of new releases but unfortunately, I will be away from writing whilst I do some designing.
I'm sorry for the inconvenience on the 15 people who read this :P
Take care guys and I'll see you with a properly working website.
Its yet again another week of repeats this week as both Real Steel and Johnny English manage to stick to their top spots respectively. In America, Real Steel clings on with the "you're boyfriend will love this for the fighting and father son relationship" movie making $16.3 million whilst shocking remakes Footloose and The Thing come limping in disappointingly (or rightfully so) at 2nd and 3rd place.
Over where we live Mr Bean's A Spy otherwise known as Johnny English saves itself from tumbling down the box office charts and fighting off The Three Muskateers to secure top spot taking £3.1 million. TTM, with their near perfect hair for the 18th century, came in third whilst The Lion King, (boo yah) still sits in second.
All this just makes me worry about the state of people going to the cinema. I mean really, these two films have a second week on the top of the box office and the brilliant Drive only came in 7th?
Anyone else feeling the stuffy cold of winter? Blocked noses, sore throats and headaches? It is truly a bitter season. So what better excuse to fill the warm seat of cinema and stuff ourselves with warm popcorn and nachos? We are but animals who need to stuff for winter after all. And in the fest, what movies could be background noise? And if you look at the movies this week, that is probably the best explanation for them.
Real Steel
Based on a children's toy called Rock Em, Sock Em, Real Steel is set in the near future where robot boxing has become the top sport. Struggling promoter Charlie finds a discarded robot and attempt to train him to become a champion. During the rise to the top Charlie discovers he has a son Max who is desperate to know about his father. As the new robot Atom battles, can they win the matches and the hearts of the public?
Staring Hugh Jackman, Real Steel, and I tell no lie, is basically Rocky but with Robots. The men in your life will probably love it.
Dolphin Tale
Based on a true story and full of so much sugary sickness that even the poster is vomit inducing.
I mean seriously. Anyway, Dolphin Tale is about the relationship between a boy and a dolphin. A lonely and friendless boy discovers a dolphin trapped inside a crab trap and releases him but was unable to save its tail. The boy becoming, obviously, attached to the dolphin believes it can swim with a prosthetic tale. Guess the ending, wipe the tears.
It's the skinny Free Willy and it's true. The kids are going to love it but I'd bring some tissues. You know to clean up the vomit of too much love and happiness.
Sleeping Beauty
Sleeping Beauty is an Australian erotic drama. That's all you need to know.
Oh you want to know more? It's an erotic drama, that's acceptable porn! Ok, ok. There isn't much to go on. Lucy (which by the way is played by the girl from Ghost Ship. It makes the film that little bit more uncomfortable) is a shy student who starts University and finds herself deep in the world of passion, love, beauty and desire.
The other two films out this week are The Three Musketeers and Footloose. Both of them are remakes and I don't particularly want to describe them because you should know them. From the originals.
Well well well, I felt ridiculously guilty about my previous post that despite downing my fifteenth lemsip and surround by a pile of tissues, I thought that I might as well write about the movie news that have hit my ears over the past 7 - 8 days. And I have a funny feeling one of these tid-bits for you may be the reason why I am ill. Have a guess which one it is.
Good News:
It's BFI time! and the film 360 kicks starts an exciting month of brand new cinema. I've been smart and booked tickets for some of them so I can give you only the best of reviews in the only way I see fit (dry and sarcastic, of course)As well as movies, the BFI is a host to interviews and of course a bunch of wonderful awards. Of the stars who arrived on the red carpet were stars of the movie Anthony Hopkins and Jude Law as well Tom Hiddleston and Terry Gilliam. The BFI London Film Festival carries on til the 26th of October and you can catch 360 in cinemas next year as it tells the story of relationships and loves throughout the course of different countries.
I re-watched The Dark Knight the other day and there is some stellar acting in it. No, that's not the news (if I had it my way though, it would be. every day,) but its a segue as I am lamenting one of this generations more underrated actors; Aaron Eckhart. But luckily, he has signed on to play the creature in Steven Beatties I, Frankenstein. A long with five other movies in production on the Mary Shelley story, this one is set to be different from the rest as it focuses on the creature and his part in a battle between two immortal gangs. It is an unique spin that will hopefully set it apart. It does mean, though, we get to once again see Eckharts luscious locks go under makeup again which is a shame because he is one rinse away from being the poster boy for L'Oreal.
"BECAUSE YOU'RE WOOOORTTTH IT!"
Finally in the good news the 80's teen hero John Cussack has all grown up and is playing Amercia's favourite demented writer (I say America because we have loads more crazy assed writers) Edgar Allen Poe in The Raven and the trailer has just hit online. And trust me, it looks goooooood. The Raven revolves around a series of murders based on the horror stories Poe had created (The Pit And The Pendulum, The Tale Tell Heart etc.) The writer is called in firstly under suspicion but soon becomes help to the detective Emmett Fields (the most American classic name ever, seriously Emmett?) It looks like its full of twists and possible historical inaccuracies (like oodles of them from what I gather of the trailer) but nonetheless it looks ace. Check out the trailer)
Bad News
Don't get me wrong, I love Rob Zombies work but that's because somewhere inside me there is a sick and twisted 14 year old goth that I used to be. So I secretly love House of 1000 Corpses despite its disturbing horror porn connotations. However, since bastardizing the Halloween classics with *shudder* remakes, Zombie is a name spoken with venom in my house. There's a lot of money going into the Zombie jar this week as he casts for his new movie Lord Of Salem. The premise involves ressurected Salem witches and haunted records that don't sound like an really bad 80's horror movie at all. On the career death list are Billy Drago, Meg Foster and Ernest Thomas so Zombie is hitting it with all the A-Listers. Oops looks like I out did my sarcasm quota for today.
The Human Centipede 2 now or as I like to call it "The most unnecessary film that is there merely to offend because Tom Sixx is a sick individual and I can't believe there is a part 2. Part 2." And The BBFC have given in to its demands giving it an 18 certificate. Of course, a lot of editing had to be done (which means the film will probably be title, screaming and then credits and thus better than anything originally planned) After cutting around 2 minutes and 32 seconds the film will be released over in the UK. And will no doubt be passed around illegally through 13 year old boys. I am honestly damn disappointed about this. To cheer me and you up;
THE KITTEN CUTEAPEID!
And finally, perhaps the most shocking news to feature on the bad news; The Avengers. I've been harping about this movie for a while and finally a trailer hits. And it's shockingly disappointing. I get that the premise is an amalgamation of all our favourite heroes (forgetting that they have forgotten about the X-Men in this) but The Avengers trailers seems too much like the same as any other trailer they have released for Superhero movies. I'm not going to lie, I may have wet my pants out of excitement of seeing it the first time but the second time I see all its faults. An evil super villain voice over? Check. Explosions? Check. Not introducing important characters? Check. Relying on the comedic relief of everyones favourite? Check. Samuel L Jackson being badass? Check. It seems too much like Iron Man 3 at the moment rather than The Avengers. The film is going to be great, I know, but there isn't much hope after seeing this. Maybe closer to the time they can do better than this piece of trailer crap they have done. Check it out.
Epic apologises to you all, the handful of people who read this blog. I am currently ridiculously ill and am struggling to get all my work that I have backed up done. I know I have been lax on this blog for a couple of weeks and I am sorry about that. Having just entered my third year of university and finding a bit more complication in my life, I am trying to find a balance to do this blog, work and pass my degree. Don't worry. I am not quitting, I am gathering resources and soon I'll be back to writing articles, reviews and more.
On that note though, Film News Round Up may be postponed til tomorrow or next week. This is because of me being ill. Unless I kick myself up the jacksy and you'll get it later tonight.
They really do clutch at straws, movie makers don't they? Since Transformers fell of its track (after five minutes of the first movie I might add) we have been looking for something to replace it. Enter the Transformers younger cousin Real Steel, a movie based on, I kid you not, the Rock Em Sock Em battle bots. And it is taking America by storm fighting its way to top of the box office. It earned a whopping £27.3million edging the ever adorable Dolphin Tale into third with George Clooney's political drama (thrilling) The Ides of March coming in second.
Over in the UK, we aren't that better as English comedy Johnny English Reborn is our number one film. Eight years after the first film release, we get to see the hapless secret agent bumble its way to the top accumulating £4.97 million. That's nearly double The Lion King re-release that came in second with £2.7 million.
It's disappointing England. We can do so much better. What comes out this week?
Brrrrrrrrr. It is rather chilly. Our Indian Summer has gone and now we are stuck with wooly hats, scarfs and gloves trying to snuggle to stay warm. Well, it's not all bad. It means that it is socially acceptable to go see a movie without being stared at for not enjoying the sunshine. Joys, we can be movie geeks in peace. And sure enough there are just enough films to keep you out of the bitter cold.
The Lion King
I know what you are thinking and yes you would be right in noting that The Lion King came out years ago. 1994 to be exact. How old do you feel now? But with the release of the DVD coming soon, Disney decided to get it's chops into release their classics in 3D. The Lion King is just the start. Now if I have to tell you the plot about The Lion King, I'm going to assume you are really young and in that case you probably wont be reading this anyway. Huh. Either that or you have a deprived childhood.The Lion King is Hamlet for those without attention span as Simba, the lion, has to overcome his treacherous uncle to assume the throne that is rightfully his.
With hilarious sidekick friends and the best bunch of songs to keep you singing away, The Lion King has already top US charts and it looks to do the same over here. Go on, be a child again.
Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark
Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark is a fairytale gone wrong. Sally, a young girl, has just been carted off to live with her dad and stepmom in an old mansion they are renovating. Clearly this girl hasn't seen horror movies as that already spells disaster and sure enough Sally finds herself the victim of creatures set upon taking her for her own. Of course, her parents don't believe the spooky goings on and it is up to Sally to defend herself before it is too late and she is lost forever.
With great graphics and terrifying monsters, Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark is one to keep you up at night. You can read the review here
Johnny English Reborn.
Rowan Atkinson is a legend who gave us the brilliant annoying Mr Bean, the wonderful Black Adder and voiced Zazu in The Lion King. His sketches were always fantastic and recently he has delighted as Fagin in the West End Production of Olivier. So, it is with that, that I can only assume he has squandered all his earned or been out of the acting game for an amount of time because this is this years most unnecessary movie. Johnny English is a bumbling secret agent who accidentally in the previous film uncovered a murderous plot against the queen and England. This time he goes international against assassins to find the Chinese premier.
A film for the family and it will keep the children entertained because lets face it, they are one step away from being idiots anyway.
But if you choose to take them to this over The Lion King than you are an idiot too.
We all had that story when we were younger; we saw something out of this world. Whether it be a ghost, a creature or something creepy we all sensed that we aren't alone on this planet. Yet when we open our voices and told everyone we knew about it we were shot down like a crazy person. Sure, we weren't tin hatted yet but it made us paranoid and unable to sleep without all lights a blazing. Programs such as Goosebumps and the aptly named for this review Are You Afraid Of The Dark? played on that fear of ghouls and goblins so much so that after school programmes were just as terrifying as the movies are parents banned us from watching. No, not those types of movies you dirty people. Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark is a film that takes us back to that childhood fear; that something was stalking us but no one believed us.
Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark centers around 8 year old Sally who is sent away by her mother to live with her dad and new step mother Kim. Of course, her father doesn't live in a normal penthouse flat with maximum security and no history of Indian graveyards; they live in an old mansion that they are renovating to sell. The same house we saw plague the old inhabitant before. Sally soon discovers that there are other things in the house, other things that creep around in the shadows. Intrigued by the creatures Sally wants nothing more than to befriend them with all the childhood innocent she has. The creatures on the other hand want her and nothing else. Soon, Sally realises that her life is at stake. But will anyone believe her that monsters want to take her away? Will she survive the night or be victim to them?
Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark is by Guillermo Del Torro who gave us such creepy outings as Pan's Labyrinth and L'Orphanage both with children at the centre of the horrifying fantasy. While the original film (yes, its a remake) had Sally as woman, Del Torro decided to keep her young and boy the change pays off. Young Baliee Madison gives a wonderful performance as the tormented Sally. She manages to convey a series of emotions such as curiosity, fear and innocence that an adult could never do. Playing a long side good actors, she holds her own as the pivotal story plot and she is spell binding to watch in the role because she never falters from her character who can be completely bratty but you root for her anyway. And the creatures who plague her are terrifying enough to make this horror story downright scary. The scurry around like deformed mice who whisper and torture the poor girl into taking her away. The graphics and pictures of them are downright spooky and will haunt you every time you hear a scuffle in your house.
It's not all great though and unfortunately the adults within the movie cannot hold their own in the film. Katie Holmes and Guy Pearce are wooden and unemotional as the concerned parents and seem more bothered about their appearance on the movie than actual portraying any kind of solid character. Which is as much the fault of the writing too. There isn't enough in the movie to give any bond between the family and the build up around Sally and the creatures is weak, ending in a climax that is over far before it began. Instead of being scared as we were in the beginning, as the story unfolds the excitement fades and becomes less tense and more tedious. Even with the last second twist at the end, there isn't anything to care about and it mirrors cliched over done monster movies. Also, the creatures looks are shown way too early in the movie so whilst they may be terrifying to look at and beyond creepy, we see them far too often for that fear to set in throughout.
Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark works on some levels; it has wonderful detail and is visually stunning to look at from the house to the decrepit basement. Yet we know what is going to happen early on and we know who does it; there isn't much too carry on in the film. It is far shorter than expected and it is a detriment to the movie. Mixed that with placid and dull performances from the older generation and a film that has the potential to keep you up at night becomes almost a snooze fest. Saying that, I'll be sleeping with the light on tonight. You know, just to be sure.
So here is the second half of the Film News Round Up but its the scary half. The bad bad bad why must you torture me half that can't be read with the lights off. You'll be having Twilight nightmares for the rest of your life.
Bad News
In similar vein to Thomas Harris writing that book and film which shall not be named, Stephen King has decided to resurrect the blinding book The Shining and create a sequel. Ok so it's not really to do with movies but no doubt Hollywood are drooling at the possibility to make it (I'm mean, look how quickly the release of THAT book got made into THAT film.) After thirty years since the original, how is it going to appeal to a younger more hip audience? That's right, vampires. Goddamn vampires. Yet another reason why you should hate Twilight. The Shining was a phenomenon that capture the fear in the hearts of everyone. Vampires, nowadays, are sparkly. Gives a whole new meaning to The Shining.
On the similar note and just because you know how much I like to rip apart plans for sequels but Owen Wilson has talked about a Zoolander 2 movie. This has already been spoken about by Ben Stiller but now more details have emerged about the...sigh... sequel. It is to be set ten years into the future and apparently Hansel has lost all his looks in a disfiguring accident (insert Owen Wilson joke here.) Don't get me wrong, I fricken love Zoolander but has the time passed for a sequel. Are they just flogging any old shite from Hollywood? Yes, please see Final Destination 5 for more details.
And finally Mortal Kombat. The so bad it's good game turned movie is getting a reboot and I am thrilled. Thrilled because I have more stuff to write about in a witty scathing way. No doubt the new Mortal Kombat will be taken as serious as the ridiculous Fast Furious 5 (that is that it takes it self too serious) and will drive away from the rubbish that made Mortal Kombat kind of legendary. That said a serious of shorts and trailers have hit our screens and the web series were a big hit. Maybe I am wrong or maybe I am skeptical and it could really turn out well.
Well hello,guys and a dolls, you're such a crazy bunch of guys and dolls (jazz hands.) How are we doing today? It's been a whole week since I last commented on the lunatic ravings of Hollywood. As I have something slap bang in the middle of today I have split up the good news and bad news just for today. So you get to enjoy the best without knowing the worst is just a scroll away. Well, at least before tonight anyway.
Good News
The BFI London Film Festival is heading it's way to our little country and there are a lot of good films and events to watch including an interview with Seth Rogen and a guest host of Anthony Hopkins (squeal.) The BFI also gives a fellowship to any lucky actor and this year it is Ralph Fiennes. Everyone's favourite villain actor (because he does not work as a good guy, I'm looking at you Maid in Manhatten) is to be awarded the prize after his long career of acting, directing and writing. There are also lots of other awards too. Now, if you don't know who Fiennes is (which should be a penalty with some jail time attached to it) he has stared in little films such as oh I don't know Clash of the Titans, Red Dragon, The English Patient and this really indie fantasy film called Harry Freaking Potter.
One of the most highly anticipated movie of 2012 (including Batman and Spider-man, next year is year of the geek I'm telling you,) The Avengers released the portrait shots of it's six main characters. These range from the super hot looking Black Widow (although after seeing her naked pictures, I think she is over dressed) to the fish-out-of-water-holy-crap I'm in the future Captain America, we get to see a side to the heroes that we hadn't seen before. And judging by the following Bruce Banner picture, instead of turning into a menacing green monster character he instead turns into the head of an all gay cabaret in Soho. A bit like Louie Spence. I'm being completely serious.
Don't make him sassy, you won't like him when he's sassy. Here are the other pictures of our tag team of win super heroes (which is a better name than the Avengers.)
Finally, since the highly successful re-release of The Lion King (and the amount of childhood trauma relived when Mufassa dies) Disney has put forth plans to re-release a whole bunch of classic in the cinema. Someone is cashing in. Movies such as Finding Nemo, The Little Mermaid and Beauty and The Beast have all got plans to be remastered in 3D and shown across the country again. Now, this is either a very good or very stupid idea. I for one don't care. It just gives me a good excuse to watch the films again and write reviews on them as though I've gone into the past. Disney completes me.
The Bad News will be up after midnight (insert evil laugh)
The power of schmaltz is so strong over the US that we could stop all this arguing with lovable kittens and puppies as long as it is based on a true story. So that is why ridiculously sweet "based on a true story" Dolphin Tale has swum to top spot battling The Lion King to third in the food chain. Dolphin Tale has made $14 million over the past weekend and stars Harry Connick Jnr and Winter The Dolphin. Do you want to know more? Its about a Dolphin......its like a slimmer version of Free Willy.
Wow there are a lot of movies that have arrived this week and a lot look amazing whilst the odd one looks down right stupid (I'm looking at you Whats Your Number?). That is how generous I am feeling today. Mind you though, it may be because I have had a hectic week and I haven't written a lot for you guys as I am still trying to juggle many balls. (Oo er.)
Melancholia
Lars Von Trier. He is a weird one. He directs visually stunning work but is a prick. I almost hate him for being the director of my favourite film of all time. There is always controversy surrounding him but that shouldn't mare what critics are calling a stunning beautiful movie. Melancholia starring Kirsten Dunst is about the already strained relationship between sisters Claire and Justine. Justine is getting married but she has crippling depression. Unfortunately, a planet is had straight towards earth (as it does on regular occasions) and the family must figure out their lives before they end.
A already five out of five rated film and is one of the best of the years. Just, I wouldn't take a date with you, seriously deep stuff and you may be sat in the restaurant afterwards staring at one another pondering life's existence. Good luck!
The Debt
The Debt follows three retired espionage veterans as Rachel (Helen Mirren) gets shocking news about their collegue and soon the past is playing catch up. In the late sixties they embarked on a mission to kill war criminal Fogel (not Fogel from Super Bad although that cross over would be immense.) But the mission is wrapped in secret. Did they complete it? Or didn't they? As the truth becomes more uncovered, their relationship is strained; who can they trust?
It's heart racing and wonderfully acted. It also stars piece of meat Sam Worthington. Just remember that other spy film Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy is out too.... Still out, still number one in the box office.
Red State
The Southern States of America (which was almost their own country) don't have the best of reputations. After inbreds and freaks in films such as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, rednecks aren't the most intellegent of folk on screen. And Red State isn't doing them much favours. The film focuses on a group of three teenagers who respond to an offer of sex online. Unfortunately, it is a ruse and they are trapped by religious fundamentalist who want to repent their sins.
Directed by Kevin Smith and staring Melissa Leo and John Goodman its a scary look into the dark places of religion.
Other films out this week is action film Abduction about a seemingly normal teen Taylor Launter (or as I like to call him Sexy McBuffpants) who finds out his parents aren't what they seem. There is romantic comedy Whats Your Number? about a girl who goes back to find out if any of exes are the one and the ridiculous Shark Night 3D.
Oh dear, I've dropped the ball. This week installment is two days late so by the time I tell you some of the news you are going to roll your eyes at me and go "Yes Cookie, I know, keep up." I am but one woman. After all, I'm pretty sure you don't come to this post for ground breaking news and just for the witty banter. I'm like Dave. Anyway, there are certain news to give you that I believe is the best news and the worst around.
Good News.
I'll admit it right off the bat. I have a numerous amount of weird crushes on actors who I shouldn't have weird crushes on. Like Neil Flynn, his psychotic janitor on Scrubs just gets me all gooey. I don't know why. It's an illness. On that list of crushes is the creepy but brilliant actor Jackie Earle Haley from the latest A Nightmare On Elm Street infamy. So this is good news because he is in a new film and its a Spielberg movie! He will play Andrew Stephens; the vice president of the Confederate States and a bit of a git to American hero Lincoln during the abolishing of slavery. Damn, he really does get a raw deal does our Haley, doesn't he?
Talking about new Haley movies, he is in the Tim Burton take on television series Dark Shadows (you know the worldwide famous show...........yeah I haven't heard of it either.) Sure to be a creep fest the film is about a vampire who is dug up and attempts to reintegrate with his living descendants. It's a Tim Burton film so it stars Johnny Depp as the main character Barnabas Collins (Dammit, Barnabas was going to be the name of my first born child,) and Helen Boham Carter. But the film also stars Michelle Milf-ieffer, sorry, Pfieffer and the new pictures came online.
Yeah, I think that old guy at the back is Jackie Earle Haley. Yummers.
Oh my god. It's Noel Fielding.
Well no, it's Johnny Depp but seriously separated at birth!
Remember the brilliant Roald Dahl BFG book when you were a child? And the cartoon with David Jason as the voice and the incredibley terrifying mean Giants who eat children? Well, it's being tackled again and the kid within me just jumped for joy! It's going to be live action and it is written by ET writer Melissa Mathison so its sure going to be a family favourite. I am more than excited about this despite no actors or directors being assigned to it yet. Who doesn't want to see The Big Friendly Giant again? No, I thought so, you squealed too. The only problem is wheres my The Twits movie? That would be epic and great as a Tim Burton film. Get on it dude with Depp and Burton!
So I have a secret, I secretly like Avatar. Its a bit like Glee, the storyline is rubbish but it is so pretty. So with the Pocahontas break big box office moolah, Disney have decide to cash in on this and plans are underway for an Avatar ride at the Animal Kingdom. Bob Iger (honestly, that name in my circles is Godlike.) Construction will go underway 2013 and will be based on sections of Pandora. I am very excited to see if they build a glow in the dark section. So so pretty.
Bad News.
The Human Centipede 2 is back waving its controversy around like that kooky weird girl who sleeps around with no shame. I have to say that I believe its the worst film ever made. Not because its classically bad or the acting is rubbish but because it is made to sicken and "entertain." I hate that with so much stories to tell a perverse tale made to shock people gets a sequel. Anyway, the new poster is just as bad with it screaming "Banned in the UK," which isn't technically true. It has been refused a certification but it isn't exactly banned but as that article mentions, the original was a disgusting horror movie but this one goes beyond that. It wont be shown over here though though. I've said before though, I wont show you anything to do with this film.
Kittens!!!
Talking about kittens, new photos of Anne Hathaway's Catwoman hit the internet the other day and a lot are fairly disappointed. Probably because of the immense greatness of the original Catwoman's costumes whether it is the Julie Newmar or Pfieffer they have been sexy or cheesy. These new photos though show Hathaway's costume being very bland or non. We are all no doubt excited about The Dark Knight Rises but this may be the one thing that ruins the whole thing. Don't do it Nolan! At least give her some better ears. Or a tail!
We move on to the Wanted that film that was based on the graphic novel. When we say based, they striped away all the amazing parallel universe and super villain stuff and made it a basic action movie. So rubbish basically (and they had so much to work with.) Anyway, Wanted 2 is moving forward apparently with the writers back on board and excited about working on it. If you don't remember the first movie, it starred Angelina Jolie, James McAvoy and Morgan Freeman. That's all you need to know.
Finally the people at Universal are plotting something evil and in my head, it looks something like this;
This time its worse. You know that film that all the guys and the butch ladies go on about. No no, not The Godfather but Scarface. Yes, bosses over at Hollywood believe that the Italian drug lord baron that made Al Pacion news a fresher audience. There aren't calling it a re-make despite the fact that the original, was you know, a remake and it is interesting to see what take they put on it for the newer audience. Oh did I say interesting? I meant completely horrifying! So to combat this I can only do what I see fit. Hey, say hello to my little friends.
Boo, I am sorry that Films News Round Up is late this week due to prior commitments but you'll get it tomorrow. I'll even add some extra shiznit for you beautiful eyes. Honestly though, it hasn't been majorly up or down this week. The biggest news is what I am about to give you. Right. Now.
Well, you've heard it before but still I think it is ace that The Lion King re release has trumped the USA box office yet again. It fought off films such as baseball film Moneyball and amputee film Dolphin's Tale. Like a proud lioness stalks its prey (seriously? that was the best lion analogy I could come up with? Man, I'm tired.) The Lion King another $22 million to secure top spot. The re-release is supposedly only for two weeks but with it raking in an impressive $390 million, expect Disney to keep a hold of this one.
Over the pond, homemade British film with a hint of Swedish (like your mum dancing to Abba at your cousins wedding. You know the wedding....,) Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy took £2.1 million and was still top of the class (a-team) beating Crazy Stupid Love to second place. Warrior came in at third and Drive came in a less than impressive fifth. Boo on that. Mind you, you do get to see a semi naked Gosling and Emma Stone. I can't really blame you for that. Stone trumps all.
Ah well its that time of the week again where I tell you what you probably already know if you have seen a billboard or a bus go by (which, technically, doesn't count because I saw an Iron Man 2 advertisement today and that was a while back.) Anyway, there are several films that have already gotten 4 to 5 out of stars from critics (like I said before, my film review of what I hope to be Drive wont be out until Monday due to clashes with, you know, life.) Go watch them, they may be the best film of the year in your eyes (and too many people are harping on about how great Friends With Benefits is)
Drive
Hmmm there are two Ryan Gosling movies out this week. So if you haven't had your Gosling fix and your TheNotebook DVD is skipping ("everrrryyyydayyyy for a a a a yeaaaar") than take a gander at this beauty. Ryan Gosling plays Driver, a no named Hollywood stunt driver who moonlights with the mob on weekends (as you do.) Unfortunately, a heist goes wrong and soon the Driver gets embroiled in a whole lot of mess since an attempt is left on his head . Its a vicious fight for survival as Driver is hunted for, well, for blood.
Driver has already received rave reviews as well as a standing ovation from the Cannes Film Festival. You'll get my review of it Monday but until then, watch it and let me know what you think.
Crazy. Stupid. Love.
The second Gosling outing this week (and more of his body, yummers,) along with Julianne Moore and Steve Carrell. The latter play married couple Cal and Emily who hit a rough patch when one of them cheats on the other (thats Emily who did the dirty.) Instead of moping about, Cal seeks advice from ultimate singleton Jacob (Gosling) and soon Cal is back into dating. Despite all this, Cal is desperate for his marriage and relationship with his children to be back on track. And Jacob has his own worries.
Its a heart warming comedy about family values with hilarious moments.
Oh I'm sorry did I forget to mention it stars friggen Emma Stone. Thats better than the Gosling thing...
Warrior
For the chav in you but definitely has some highlights *cough* Tom Hardy *cough.* But beneath it there is a genuine touching story line that I'm sure that your guy mates are salivating to watch. It centres around the MMA championships (Mixed Martial Arts) and both Brendan, a down and out teacher, and Tommy, an ex-marine, want the be winners. Problem is, they are both brothers. With the same loathing for their alcoholic dad and the drive to win, it all rests on a showdown. Who will come out top?
Its testosterone filled but it has a pulse beating beneath all those muscles (oooo, muscles) Definitely a dark horse of great cinema.
Also out this week is Killer Elite, but if you go and watch that over any of the films above, I may have to not speak to you for a while.
I have to note that this blog is more about the film but occasionally, will mention television Hence, why I didn't blog the Emmy's but will blog about up and coming film awards. As I haven't the time to review a new film til Monday and therefore missing out on giving you a fresh review before you have all seen it, I got to watch the latest offering from "Glee" and yes, I loved every second of it.
Glee have had a disappointing summer. Their concert 3D movie which was supposed to be brilliant flopped majorly at the box office despite being a sell-out. And at the Emmy's (oh look, bring it back) they won two awards for Best Guest Star Gwyneth Paltrow (yes, with Kristen Chenoweth, they chose Paltrow) and Best Casting. But that's all fine, you say, as long as they have fans, right? Wrong my little munchkins, due to the extremely unsatisfying second series which saw too many guest stars, far too many loose tangents and a highly anti climatic series finale. Glee has kind of fell of it's pedestal from the first series and just like the plucky loser in the show, is willing to climb its way back up.
I'm taking series three and it is hitting are screens tomorrow at new home Sky 1. Series three picks off at the new school year, just after the major loss of Nationals. It's senior year for some such as Kurt and Rachel and its time to start thinking about their big dreams. But New Directions come back with just as many fans as they left with and even less band members. Sam has moved away, Lauren doesn't want to hurt her reputation and Quinn has come back all punked up and burnt out with a new gang called "The Skanks." It seems that its up to Will Schuester to bring them back with The Purple Piano Project; every time a student sees one they have to start playing no matter where it is. Yet with Sue back on the Glee Clubs trailer with her new political campaign and the only audition was an assault on people with ears, a National win seems less and less likely.
The new series feels like its back to the old style Glee originally captured us with. It's seemingly more dark but full of humor at the same time. It has striped away the cheesy gun hoe cliches it filled itself with in the previous series and thrown in as much depression as they can. Whilst this shouldn't work, it does bring it back to the fact Glee is an adult comedy and in this series it works better than ever. The acting is top form this year too from the disillusioned Rachel and Kurt to the sly quips from Sylvester; it feels that ever cast member wants this season to hit off with a bang. And remember The Glee Project? The first of the final four appears as Lindsey (you know, the one you fully wanted to strangle throughout the show?) has her two episodes of fame as a competitive musical theatre student. And the music is great too because there isn't any damn popular music that these kids are singing these days. It's all musical theatre and classic songs that make the group sound more like an actual Glee Club than they have ever done.
Of course, it isn't without its fault and Glee has taken a nose dive in US ratings. Trying to pick itself up from the shambolic Series Two is hard without reminding us about how badly it all went. There's the repetitive Emma and Will storyline as too if and when he will get laid as well as Finn and Rachel trying to be the brand new power up, again. And lets not forget that they harp on about being losers and that no one likes Glee Club more than ever this time. Glee is strained and needs a big boost from this to come back fighting strong.
It seems Glee has lost its star and isn't the budding new thing on the scene anymore. But it is still fighting and although it has lost fans, it is gaining well acclaimed criticism. It's not perfection or brilliance but it is fun and enjoyable to say the least. Certainly it will give people what they come to expect from Glee and the show feels like it's digging up its roots again. If the season premiere is anything to go by, it's going to be a great series and hopefully will live up to the expectations it promised us in the first season.
I was having this conversation the other day with a friend of mine; Paddy Considine is a living breathing British legend. If you don't recognise that name, then shame on you because he is by far one of the best actors of our generation. He has been in Hot Fuzz, The Bourne Ultimatum, 24 Hour Party People and In America. So if you combine Paddy Considine with the brilliance that is Shane Meadows, who around the success of Once Upon A Time In The Midlands and This Is England knocked out this beauty of a film, (I just realised how British I'm sounding here,) and you have a damn near masterpiece of a revenge thriller film.
Set in the sleepy town of Matlock (that's up North for you Southerners,) Dead Man's Shoes focus on Richard - a recently returned Army Mercenary. But all is not well with his arrival, as he soon discovers that his mentally ill brother Anthony has been abused, manipulated and tortured by a drug heavy gang whilst he was away. Richard, already dissaffected from the war is not one for being forgiveful ("God will forgive them and let them into heaven. I can't let that happen," and soon exacts his revenge on every single member who hurt his younger brother. Using guerrilla tactics, scare factors and picking off the gang members one by one, Richard sees himself as an Angel of Vengeance and protector to his little brother who also teaches Richard that there are perhaps skeletons in his closet too.
As mentioned before, the acting in Dead Man's Shoes is breath-taking. Considine is pure genius as the tortured and torturer Richard as he battles demons from the real gang members to the ones inside his head. He brings effortlessly a sense of humanity but anger to the character and does it all so realistically that is inspiring to watch. Not only does Considine do a fantastic job but Toby Kebbell does a sensitive portrayal of the mental handicapped Anthony. The two work brilliantly as the near child Anthony and the anguished Richard as they bounce off each other in their relationship throughout the journey of anguish. The other actors such as Sonny and Herbie (gang members) do well as the antagonists too.
And the directing is great, choosing to flip between the past with snippets of Anthony's abuse to the present but it is done in a unique way. For example, you don't get the whole of the abuse but as each gang member remembers exactly what they have done you get their own guilt and regret. It plays out well and is much a testament to Shane Meadows directing skills as well. Meadows also writes a wonderful story. Although the vengence film has been done before, Meadows adds to it and creates so many twists and turns that culminates to the sad and shocking finale of the film. The lines and the story brings about so many emotions without chucking them at you in forced stereotypes but instead delicately making the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.
Of course, Dead Man's Shoes isn't everyone's cup of tea (if you've seen it, you'll get that.) It is heavily violent and some scenes are really disturbing that at times you cant stomach and although it is needed, it is still upsetting to see. And there are significant moments in the film that seem to be brushed over especially a truly important moment within the film. The same can be said for certain characters, although acted terrifically by Gary Stretch, Sonny is barely the monster they make him out to be and isn't menacing (although completely sick at times.) There is a lot dangling in the air in Dead Man Shoe's that could be plucked, explored and made deeper.
Despite its violence, Dead Man's Shoes is heartbreaking. It is a tale about brotherly love and the lengths we will go to if a family member is hurt in the way Anthony was. Richard is the part of us we don't like to admit is there but we know exists. He stands for the love and anguish we feel when one of our own is threatened. Dead Man's Shoes is our darkest fantasies in times of troubles but end so sorrow-filled that in the end you'll be judging yourself and the things you do to your fellow human being. It is a genius script and incredible look into the human psyche. Terrifyingly beautiful, it is the best of British cinema.
It's the circle of life, just as the sun falls and rises one movies time must end. If you know that quote then you have guessed it. The re-release of Lion King in 3D has roared its way to the number one spot of the US Box Office. Yes, even though it was released in 1994 Walt Disney have trumped all records for the biggest return ever. It has racked up $30.2 million and that's at least a few weeks before it is released in UK cinemas. It has even racked up more than the Toy Story 1 & 2 re-release! Amazing stuff from a 17 year old film! (Yes you heard me, 17 years. How old do you feel now?)
In first place position in the UK, the incredible Tinker Tailer Soldier Spy has knocked of The Inbetweeners Movie off the top spot (finally) racking in a wonderful £2.8 million whilst The Change Up came in fifth and I Don't Know How She Does It came in seventh. Finally, a great British (and Swedish) intelligent movie has knocked off a film about sex and saddo's in the sun. It's a very proud day to be British. Have a cup of tea with your fingers raised old chap!!!!
Waahhheyyy everyone and welcome to the beginning of the week. This is where I go through the best and worst week before, are you keeping up? Anyway, I have been shifting through the mundane to give you the incredibly awesome high five the person next to you news and then the horrendously horrible wail and scream through the street news that trust me, breaks my heart too. I'm there for you buddy.
Good News
You know what is good about the up and coming Muppets movie. Not just the fact that it is an up and coming brand spanking new Muppets movie because that is pretty much the best thing ever (EVER!) If there is one thing Disney is definitely getting right it is the paraody trailers that have been hitting our screens. There was The Hang-Over 2 trailer that was better than the actual movie. There was the Green Lantern movie that was infinite times better than the actual movie and then there is the new one based on the trailer for the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. This new parody is hilarious! I don't have to tell you that this movie is going to be incredible. I'm giggling like a child in my room as we speak. (That isn't so strange but the trailer is awesome.)
In a recent interview with Empire Magazine, Jason Bateman let slip that there could be a possibility for an amazing if not already the best movie ever Arrested Development movie. Athough storylines and directors and actual confirmation can't be, well, confirmed Bateman mentioned that filming could take place as soon as next year and there will be a whole hoard of celebrity cameos. If there's one thing internet film nerds love more than Arrested Development, its funny celebrity cameos. Ace, I think I just wet myself out of excitement, (again not that uncommon.) Check out the full interview here.
And whats more nerdier than all this combined. What boldly goes into nerdom that no man has ever gone before. That's right, Jim; Star Trek. JJ Abrams has finally (fist grab) been confirmed to direct the sequel the the highly amazing first movie. With Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci (my favourite last name ever,) on the helm of screen writing duties, Abrams is fully confident that the work they have come up with already to sign on after delaying since Super 8 hit our screens. Whatever way, it is going to be highly anticipated and if he manages to whack it out next year it looks like 2012 will be the rise of the nerd.
Bad News
If I were any film making company or director, picking out what material to use wouldn't be difficult. There is a whole abundance of screenplays out there that haven't yet been picked up for time on the silver screen. For instance, my unicorn bromance comedy "Feeling Horny" has persistently been turned down but trust me, its an Oscar worthy piece of work. So how does one make the choice to go from a unique screenplay to a Postman Pat movie? Yes, you heard me. A Postman Pat movie. To coincide with his 30th anniversary in 2013, PP stars voice talents of Rupert Grint and David Tennant and sees lovable mailman Pat enter a talent competition and be tempted by the fame. Oh christ, whats next? A Teletubbies movie? One where there mound is threatened bu human invasion and the Teletubbies are going to be subjected to alien experiments if they don't
fight for it. Actually, I may have something....best get writing.
If movies based around classic children's television doesn't get you banging your head repeatedly against the wall then completely bastardizing classic text will. There are thousands of adaptations about Oliver Twist from the fabulous musical to the equally great dramatic version. It's been and done and its safe to say that Oliver Twist is cinema gold but it's been done. That's why Micheal Roberts has written a brand new version which sounds so terrible that it rivals Twilight and its crappiness. It's called Olivia Twisted and its a 19 year old orphan girl who rounds up street urchins to steal but finds herself in a turf war between a rival gang. Yes, read that sentence again without your nose bleeding out of frustration. And poor Ashley Greene, she has signed up for it already. She did so well in Scott Pilgram, don't go back to the dark side of cinema.
Finally, we come to a subject close to my heart as it dabbles with my favourite film, The Silence Of The Lambs and my favourite villain Hannibal Lecter. A television series based on the relationship between Lecter and FBI agent Will Graham before Red Dragon. Now, it took months of therapy to forget about Hannibal Rising but people seem insistent on giving us more background to the originally enigmatic serial killer. The project is headed by Pushing Daisies producer Bryan Fuller and therefore that is the name that I shake my angry fists of rage at.
When everyone thinks about spies their are two things that come to mine; the suave sexy ladies man with all the gadgets James Bond and then Austin Powers. And then we go further into the Bourne Identity etc etc. But no matter which way you look at it spies are the greatest bad-asses around. But really? Is that really life? Do spies skid across the bonnets of cars and right into a girls vagina's? Well no, not really and that's why you don't hear on a train "I'm sorry for the delay there is a shoot out on the tracks," no, it is always leaves. And Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy strips away the glamour and the explosions and set espionage in the drabbest place ever; 1970's Britain.
Tinker Tailer Soldier Spy is a film based on John Le Carre' (don't let the name fool you, it's a pen name, he is British,) best-selling novel of the same name. It centres around George Smiley as he is called back from forced retirement to hunt down a mole within the MI6. As this is set in the 1970's, the MI6 and their American counterparts are in a Cold War with the Soviets that is escalating day by day. And that pressure is worsened by someone betraying them. Whats worse, it is someone right at the top of "the circus." The paranoia, the suspicion and the violence is escalating; its a race against time for Smiley to hunt down the mole, even if it means uncovering someone close.
As I have said (numerous times) before, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy has the greatest cast ever assembled and each do a sterling job. From veteran actors Gary Oldham and John Hurt to rising stars Tom Hardy and Benedict Cumberbatch, there are some fantastic performances and none over shadow each other given enough space for them all to shine. Of course, the highlight is Gary Oldham and without saying much he manages to draw you in to the world of George Smiley using slight facial expressions. Smiley is quiet, reserved but has the power of all investigation under the finger tips. Oldham conveys it all simply but compelling. And its not just Oldham; Mark Strong is superb as Prideaux and Hardy is certainly one of this years greatest stars, shining on with emotive yet dark story to tell as Ricki Tarr. Each performance bounces off each other in a cleverly well written script that doesn't give any clues to who the mole is. It's a wonderful piece well written by Peter Straughan and the late Bridgett O'Connor; it has great conversation pieces the unfolds the plot beautifully within the words.
The film, I have to admit, isn't entirely British. It is directed by Let The Right One In direcot Tom Alfredson (who is Swedish) and he does a cracking job. The cinematography is wonderful and each scene from the close ups to the rolling scenes are exquisite. He also captures the vibe of the 70's from the dank brown fashion to the culture; music and all. You will be much mistaken for thinking you had fallen asleep and woken in the past somewhere. Alfredson takes a great care to the subject and does the book proud; with concise precision and a conducting the film with near perfection.
Yet in this day and age, without the sex and violence we now commonly associate with spies, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy tends to drag and at two hours long it is certainly a haul to get through. There is a lot of information to in take and despite the brilliance of it all, it isn't one for those looking for a quick cinema fix. Also, the flipping between flashbacks and the present day, all though vital, can be unclear and extremely confusing. You'll have to keep your guard up at all times in case you miss a key element to this film.
Otherwise it certainly is a triumph of media. Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, of course, has been done before most notably the TV series with Alec Guinness as the Smiley role. But this adaptation recognises that and gives more to the table. The ever versatile Oldham does his grandest performance yet and it will undoubtedly be recognised in up and coming award ceremonies. Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy is Britain at it's finest (with a little Scandinavian to boot) and does the book justice. A truly amazing film.
